Man, I don’t get paid enough for this. I’m working at a 7/11 across the street from the only bank in town. Even those big-cheese business execs have a weakness for Hostess cakes and Snickers. After a while, you start to recognize their faces. The old fat one likes our breakfast burritos, the truck driver’s got a soft spot for Devil cakes, and my manager steals 100-Grand bars like they’re… well, they are candy.

But today there was someone new in the store. Some skinny, white, blonde-haired crack addict. I kept an eye on him. His messed up face and shifty eyes told me he was up to something; shoplifting, probably. He grabbed a bag of Mike & Ike’s off the shelf, and took a can of pop out of the fridge. He brought it up to the counter, and I saw him reach for his wallet. The only problem is, a guy like this doesn’t have a wallet. I asked him if that’d be all for him, and he, of course, said no.

He wants all the money in my register, and that “wallet” he was reaching for was a Glock-17. I still don’t know how he got it, but it was out of his waistband and in my face pretty quickly. He kept screaming “Give me the money!” as if it would change my mind. This guy wasn’t getting shit from me.  “Give me the Fucking money!”

I laughed at him. “No, no. You’re not getting anything from me. Go ahead, shoot me. The police station is down the block and they’ll be chasing the man who murdered their favourite donut cashier.”

I told him, to his face, No. I think he got the message too, seeing as he paid for his candy and pop, put the gun away and left.

My manager came out of the bathroom wondering why all the customers were on the floor.

http://www.miaminewtimes.com/news/florida-woman-stops-robbery-by-laughing-at-crook-and-saying-no-6529159